Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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