His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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