Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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