Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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