I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
