Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Randomize