And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
