what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
