He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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