Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I want to be your penis for a week.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Randomize
