he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
