no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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