Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize