your room smells of hookers.
And success
someone get that fucking seahorse.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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