hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
