Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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