He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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