omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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