i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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