I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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