Just mADE A PArabola og urine
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
