was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
