When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
