Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
