i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
