So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
COCAINE IS GR8
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Randomize
