I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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