my soul wont recognize me after tonight
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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