You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
When are your genitals available?
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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