Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
