already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Why did my mother make you get naked?
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