Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
