No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Randomize
