Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Small penises have feelings too.
two words: eviction party
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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