Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
