I want to stick my p in your. b.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize