He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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