Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
