I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
thus making me awesome and them whores
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize
