and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
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