This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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