Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
