I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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