He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize