The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize