My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
