hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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