so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
