someone get that fucking seahorse.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
