I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
