This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
